I just wanted to thank everyone who made the trek out to the Hukilau ’03. The event was epic and you are all part of my very dear Tiki Ohana!
Thanks to Swanky & Kaliki, you GLOW girl, think pink! Bre-elle and Tristan, you are both so hot! Otto, Doe, and Vander, (what a heart-breaker!) Thanks to my new best friend Wayne Coombs and artists Derek and Rain. Casey, say “Ciao” to Charlie for me! I Belli Di Waikiki sailor boys, I love you guys! Kern, the Mai Kai is Tiki Mecca! You are so on top of your game, so would you please come down from the bar now? Pia, my husband is available to you at any time and thanks for letting me use your office as a dressing room, I felt so famous! Vixen & Bruce it was fun, Tiki Bob you are my Eye Doctor Candy Man!
Also, it was so ono to meet all the cool TC peepoze for the first time! Inky, please warn me the next time you need a third for a threesome! Purple Jade, if you ain’t my cousin then you must be my sister! “Yee haw!” Basement & Heather, Brad & Julee what a crew! May the South Rise again! Mr. & Mrs. Tiki Mug it was such a pleasure, great pics too! AFA TASI & Papa Oceanside welcomes you! Vern I’d wait in line with you anytime! James T. I’m sorry if I stepped on your head! And the cool guy that gave me the Kahiki postcard of the Mystery Girl! Wow!!!
Nice showing Hoity Toities! It was so good to see you all out in force. Bamboo Ben, I hear we are in big trouble! (I don’t know it was just something Denny said!) Crazy Al, you look so pretty with your hair all spread out on a pillow. (Yeah, I was talking to YOU this time!) Tiki Farmer sorry about the shipping drought! May your fields of Tikis continue to flourish in great abundance! Pup, nice new Tiki ink, you brave man you! Your efforts on the nametags are always appreciated as well as coveted! Sugar Caddy Daddy, Al says it must be the fifty-dollar haircut! How do you do it, Man? Dr. Z & Z Girl, thanks for helping me get my ice cream fix! King K, thanks for letting me crash your show. I promise to rehearse more in the future and learn the &*%#ing lyrics!
To honorary Toities… Hummu & Gecko, you are too close to us all not to be part of the Ohana! Last of all, Gecko… You have stolen my heart like all the rest. I too, am NOT IMMUNE to the SWOON!
My Ode to Hukilau ’03…
The Hukilau ’03 Song
Oh, we went to the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody wants to go to the Hukilau,
And we’ve had a Gecko in our house for at least a week now.
We packed up our Tikis,
And drove away from the clouds,
How it all fit into the car, we will never know how,
Off to Long Beach, to the Hukilau, the HHHHHL!
We can’t believe we’re going to the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
We hope everybody’s at the Hukilau,
Hoity Toities represent TC from So. Cal.
As we walked into the airport,
Well, who should we see, but Holden, Bamboo Ben and Mrs. B?
So drinks flow at the, at the Cockpit Lounge,
Here we come, HHHL!
We started flying to the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Nobody slept on the plane now,
Even rum and pills couldn’t help us now!
The flight was quick,
We didn’t spend too much loot,
Even when Ben lost the bag, with his bamboo suit.
We’re on our way now to the Hukilau, the HHHHL!
Oh we’re arriving in Lauderdale,
For the HHHHHL.
Tiki, bless the guys at the Holiday Day Inn,
They let us check in at 7:00 am.
Basement and his crew revive us with rum,
Man, this is starting to get really fun!
Meeting new peeps now at the Huiklau, the HHHHL!
It’s only Thursday at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody previewed the Mai Kai,
At the ‘meet and greet’ no one was too shy.
All the Tikis that they have there really blew our minds,
Kern, Kulani, and Pia are really da kine!
Trying a few drinks now at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Oh we’re kicking off the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Mr. Bamboo trys a Shark Bite,
And anything he wants for twelve dollars, that’s right!
The King’s in the Molokai,
strummin’ his uke,
He jams with the local boyz,
But he’s still a kook!
Let’s try another drink now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL!
Now we’re swimming at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody is feelin’ real chipper,
And the Yankee Clipper’s Wreck Bar has never been hipper!
When Al and Shell crashed the Wreck’s pool,
Seeing his black undies really made her drool,
Al and Shell are bathing beauties now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Oh we’re all drunk now at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Pup and Gecko searched the Hukilau,
For the Hoity Toities who had missed them somehow!
Then Crazy Al moves in, so Gecko gets the floor,
“Hey, Shelley, go to sleep it’s way after four!”
We rage on now at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
So it’s Friday at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody is gearing up now.
Holden’s mugs are late and he’s having a cow!
All the Tiki kids can’t wait until six,
So they can stand in line and pick up a slip,
Shop on and on now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
It’s time to dance now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Wayne Coomb’s Ballroom is the scene now,
Those Delusionaires really rocked the house.
I Belli Di Waikiki’s set was so trick,
And the King told the audience that he shit a brick.
Party on now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
The show’s not over now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
While Tiki Bob’s bar held an all nighter,
Down on the beach they were taking turns with the lighter.
Basement and Belli boys making fireworks fly,
It’s a good thing that nobody lost a leg or an eye.
Blow it up now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Its swap meet time now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Cool collector crap on the twelfth floor,
Where the vendors let the shoppers feel free to explore,
AFA TASI is there slicing coconuts,
You can come on in until my door shuts,
Buy it up now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Its Mai Kai time now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody’s in the Molokai Bar,
Where the Mystery girls are never too far,
Oh my Tiki Gods, the time is finally here,
The King’s in the bar and it’s perfectly clear,
It’s paradise now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
It’s time to sit down, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody’s in the show room,
Where the island drums are beginning to boom.
WHAT? I’m sitting with the VIPs?
Is this really happening to me? Oh, Thank-you Kaliki!
Having ono grinds now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
It’s ShowTime now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Everybody’s watching the wahines dance,
Where their lovely hula hips will put you in a trance,
Holden’s on stage, who would have guessed?
He’s shaking his okohole, mo’ bettah than the rest!
It’s the Islander Revue now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Time to raise some funds now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Auctioneer Denny calls the bids out,
And the Tiki bidders raise their hands and shout,
Sold is Rain’s print, and Derek’s, too,
And a Hukilau bar made by Mr. Bamboo!
They’re makin’ bucks now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
Time for the big moment now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
The Mystery boy is getting psyched now,
He’s got the sensual gyrations that make us say, “Wow!”
And now for something you’d never expect to see,
Sharing a chair & more are Shell and Inky Louise,
It’s seduction time now, at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
It’s check out time now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Nobody wants to leave now,
Because at the Hukilau, we’ve had more fun that we ever knew how,
So let’s kidnap Denny and take him down to the Keys,
The only time we got lost was when the King had to pee.
It’s Key West road trip time now at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
It’s the Sunset Celebration time now, at the Hukilau,
The HHHHHL.
Bamboo Ben and Crazy Al rented a convertible Mustang,
Man, did they ever look like Crockett & Tubbs in that thang,
Then we meet up with the lovely Inky Louise,
The fun just never ends for the Hoity Toities,
We’re at Sloppy Joe’s now at the Hukilau, the HHHHL.
